Things I've learned in New York so far

I've been here for nearly two weeks now and it's been pretty great, apart from a few unexpected boring nights that I end up feeling oddly guilty about because I'm in the most exciting city in the world and therefore should be doing something terribly exotic and wonderful all the time. But I'll get over that soon hopefully. My internship is actually pretty awesome. I haven't had to go on any coffee runs for other people yet, but I did have to file some things once. Mostly I write press releases and research blogs that will review books the company has published.

This is kind of a big summer for me since it's my first one living completely away from home, without any kind of adult supervision like camp counselors etc. So I thought it would be good to make a list of what I've learned.

-When a dude catcalls you on the street, pretend you don't hear him. If this is not an option, tell him you have a boyfriend who is very protective, weighs 300 pounds of pure muscle, and also happens to be Eastern Europe's top cage fighter. This is kind of hilarious to people who know that the guys I usually fancy tend to be smaller than me and won't even dare kill spiders in the bathroom. But Mr. Caneyehaveyonumbuh doesn't need to know that.

-It's completely hilarious to watch tourists reading maps, and it's nice to convince yourself you'll never need one, but the second you walk a block in the wrong direction and have to awkwardly turn your lost ass around, or when you're trying to find that one little coffee shop in the village that got five stars on Yelp and all you see are upscale clothing stores, you'll wish you had the ability to swallow your pride and get a map.

-The cops you see on SVU and the ones that circle the park at night and yell at you and your friends through a megaphone to leave at 1am sharp are completely different species.

-The only train that goes to your 116th street is the 1. The 3 says it goes to 116th, and it does, but it's not the one where you live. You will get off the subway and find yourself on 116th street and "the hood where you don't belong" avenue.

-You might like the Meatpacking district because it's got wide cobblestone streets and cute restaurants and stores, but so does everyone else. You'll find that you're the only person there with no product in their hair who didn't put her makeup on with a paintroller. However, it is always fun to get an outside table at one of those trendy-cause-they're-delicious restaurants, eat a fancy grilled cheese, and watch sixteen year olds in cocktail napkin dresses try to get into clubs with their fake IDs.

-No one here has time to judge you for going to a movie alone.

-But if you eat alone, it's fine to feel so awkward that you pretend to read a book.

-The people at Pinkberry will always try to guide you through all their options even though you go there every week and the same guy who's trying to tell you how to order swirled you your second lunch last Wednesday.

-Try and not be too creepy when you go to dog parks sans dog and pet other people's dogs.

I'll be adding to this list more as the summer goes on. I'm on a quest for some food right now.